"I did not put garbage in your yard . . . Now you listen to me! I'm Mephistopheles, Prince of Darkness! When I start harassing you, you'll know it."

I really need to replace my sadly defunct digital camera. I can't afford it, but on the other hand, I can't afford to have all of my artistic expression** filtered exclusively through my cameraphone.

** This no doubt sounds high-falutin'. I would like to note that calling it artistic expression in no way constitutes a statement as to the quality of what I produce.